DANCE, To keep from crying
This week I attended a day long conference for workers in the mental health community, offered by movers and shakers with MONEY in my brave little state; that is The Howard Center**.
The theme was confronting stigma and cultivating compassion in mental health.
Five years ago, I attended a similar program where everyone was asked to imagine the future of mental health in Vermont 20 years out:
Total truth: Vermont is going in a dramatically different direction on psychiatric and substance addiction than its proposed trajectory back in 2019. I am seeing a shift away from a more client empowered model. Which has everything to do with federal monies and WHO GOT THEM (the National Association for the Mentally Ill --NAMI). Since NAMI is largely a community of parents and family members concerned about their mentally ill loved ones, I should not be surprised that the move towards six innovative peer-support led psychiatric alternative spaces was shot down in favor of 24 new psychiatric hospital beds and locked units.
I was shocked that I had heard nothing about this 200 person conference (nor had several other regional folks on the more progressive end of mental health services). I was shocked because one of the four speakers was the New York Times best-selling author of “Black Man in a White Coat” the story of his experiences of racism in his medical training and his personal evolution away from “fear and revulsion around crazy folks” to his desire to become a psychiatrist.
I am a poster child for psychiatric survivor stories, racism and moral injury in the caregiver group; facts that are well known in the community I have lived in for the last seven years:
https://www.madinamerica.com/2016/03/doctor-o-adventures-in-wonderland/
While I feel like I had to strong arm my way into obtaining a seat at this event (as a squeaky wheel, I was granted a free ticket to the ZOOM part, instead of paying $200), I am very glad that I was only able to access this conference virtually.
As I scanned the audience through the webinar, it was extremely white and female. Yet--as is usually true, MEN were the first ones at the microphone for most question and answer sessions. When the (over 70 year old white) man stood up at the end of Dr. Tweedy’s presentation and began to pontificate about theories of nature versus nurture, I almost vomited.
There had been a brief and shining moment, where I imagined the conference could have deepened into space for sharing from the heart, growing compassion, sharing more personal stories, addressing the stigma issues from a personal lens but those two men--One white and one Black--yanked it up into super cerebral and esoteric conversation.
Such a shame.
What has happened to the “step up/step back” culture that we progressives say we are cultivating?
The opening address was difficult enough for me to be very grateful that I could use all of my breathwork and emotional freedom tools to listen through the bullshit:
https://youtube.com/shorts/GdGv2h7mWXA?si=eEtrl4gUhwUoCgZw
Which made me very, very happy. I was in my own living room and could behave any way that I wanted to cope with the re-activation I was experiencing…
And then the icebreaker happened…A regional talent presenting her version of Mariam Mareba's ”Pata Pata”, encouraging the audience to get up and move. That was an experience that was truly excruciating to witness virtually, but at least I could dance all around my own efficiency apartment!
So I share the dance part with you. Since Youtube allows me to use other people's copyrighted music for one minute only, enjoy a minute of dancing and loop it if you want to keep going!
https://youtube.com/shorts/lhBgtfgCCuc?si=KYKl4Mtab6-tpMkV
WHAT DOES MENTAL HEALTH PSYCHIATRIC AND SUBSTANCE ABUSE SUPPORT LOOK LIKE IN YOUR COMMUNITY?
**More information on the fascinating history of a 150 year old institution, as it shifted its priorities, goals, and funding streams, here: https://howardcenter.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/History-of-Howard-Center_2025-04-08.pdf